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Jokes about Transport

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called ship-ment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

Three men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates. The Lord spoke unto them saying, "I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie....Hell is waiting for you. To the first man the Lord asked, "How many times did you cheat on your wife?" The first man replied, "Lord, I was a good husband. I never cheated on my wife." The Lord replied, "Very good! Not only will I allow you in, but for being faithful to your wife I will give you a huge mansion and a limo for your transportation. To the second man the Lord asked, "How many times did you cheat on your wife?" The second man replied, "Lord, I cheated on my wife twice." The Lord replied, "I will allow you to come in, but for your unfaithfulness, you will get a four- bedroom house and a BMW. To the third man the Lord asked, "So, how many times did y ou cheat on your wife?" The third man replied, "Lord, I cheated on my wife about 8 times." The Lord replied, "I will allow you to come in, but for your unfaithfulness, you will get a one-room apartment, and a Yugo for your transportation. A couple hours later the second and third men saw the first man crying his eyes out. "Why are you crying?" the two men asked. "You got the mansion and limo!" The first man replied, "I'm crying because I saw my wife a little while ago, and she was riding a skateboard!"

What do bees do if they want to use public transport ? Wait at a buzz stop !

Quotes about Love

[Long hair] is considered bohemian, which may be why I grew it, but I keep it long because I love the way it feels, part cloak, part fan, part mane, part security blanket. Marge Piercy

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. Josh Billings

A father may turn his back on his child, . but a mother's love endures through all. Washington Irving

Names of the day

ARAM - High, Exalted Origin: Armenian

ARAMA - Of the Virgin Mary Origin: Spanish

ARAN - Forest Origin: Thai

Funny fact about Furniture

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

There is more real lemon juice in Lemon Pledge furniture polish than in Country Time Lemonade.