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Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: 1.99904274017, but that's close
enough for non-technical people.
How many C++ programmers does it take to
change a light
bulb?
"You're still thinking procedurally! A properly
designed light bulb
object would inherit a change method from a
generic light bulb
class!"
Flight fifty
has a pretty rough time
above the ocean. Suddenly a voice comes over the
intercom: "Ladies and
gentlemen, please fasten your seat belts and
assume crash
positions. We have lost our engines and we are trying to put
this baby as
gentle as possible down on the water".
"Oh stewardess! Are there
any sharks in the ocean below?" asks a
little old lady,
terrified.
"Yes, I'm afraid there are some. But not to worry, we have a
special
gel in the bottle next to your chair designed especially for
emergencies like this. Just rub the gel onto your arms and
legs".
"And if I do this, the sharks won't eat me any more?" asks the
little lady.
"Oh, they will eat you all right, only they
won't enjoy it so
much".
Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight? Al Boliska
Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked 'Brightness,' but it doesn't work. Gallagher
I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv Ellen DeGeneres